Thursday, May 19, 2005

SOOO hard for the money

CONGRATULATIONS to Michelle, who took a real esate class, passed the class test, and has now passed the NYS test to become a real estate salesperson!

Good lookin' michelle.

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Tick Tock

The clock in my room is the most awesomest clock you've ever or never seen. It's a digital display, it looks about 15 years old. Its brown and the display is red, and there is a crack in it. It was just in my room when i moved into the house, its not even really mine. But I think i'm the only one who can read it. I'll explain why, and then i won't be the only one anymore. Had to end someday.

First, i have it set 15 minutes fast. So usually you just subtract 15 minutes to get the real time. Seems easy enough. BUT its not always 15 minutes fast. The display is screwed up, so the 1's digit in the hour number will display a "7" instead of a "1" and a "9" instead of a "4". So at 7:14, it's really 12:59, making it 6 hours and 15 minutes fast. Of course it could really be showing 6:59, you gotta use your head a little. When it says "9:33" that is either 9:18 or it could be 4:18. At this point it is 5 hours and 15 minutes fast.

It gets even better when the hours get up into the 10+ times. At 10:47am my clock will read 17:02... which is of course 5:02 in military time, making it 7 hours and 15 minutes fast.

I have a new clock sitting in my room but i just don't want to hook it up. I like my guests having to ASK ME! what time it is. I'll show them that the clock is right there, it's 15 minutes fast, thats all. Or 6 hours and 15 minutes fast. or 5 hours and 15 minutes fast, or 7 hours and 15 minutes fast, depending on what time of day it is.

Can't you tell time ?!?!

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

What Dreams

I had a dream last night, partially interrupted by a brief moment when i was awake. When i went back to sleep, the dream continued but on a different tangent. It takes me about 15 seconds to recount the whole thing in my head, but i think its going to turn into a lot of typing. Anyway, i thought i'd blog about it.

It was a blizzard, in the middle of the night. I'm driving down lowell ave. in CI, but all i can see is about 3 or 4 feet worth of road in the middle, everything else is snow. Everywhere snow. Very dark out, I'm thinking i need to turn my headlights on, but with all the snow i can kinda see good enough anyway. I can see headlights about a mile behind me, but they won't be nearing anytime soon. (A whole paragraph of typing just to describe a moment.)

I'm low on gas, and i'm gonna run out soon. I make the turn onto Suffolk Ave. .... which is now Terrell street. Still nothing but darkness and snow everywhere. I pull up to the curb in front of my house, not sure of how this is going to solve my cars gas problem. There's so much snow. As i get out, i can barely walk around in the snow. I'm coming up onto the lawn area, and i notice a black woman stuck in the snow in my yard. The house seems to be a million miles away. Suddenly i'm seeing from the womans point of view, her hands are out in front of her and she's patting down an area in the snow in front of her. She's on her stomach, i realize. Where she's patting starts to crack a little, and i realize whats happening.

I snap back to my own point of view, and see the wall of snow come down from further up in my yard, and bury the woman. Its going to get me too. I try to get back to the road area, but its slow moving in all the snow. The avalanche overtakes me, and i'm surfing along beneath the snow as it flows further and further down. I'm thinking 'I can't be that from the surface, good thing i made that last ditch towards the road.' I decide to wait till i stop moving to try to dig myself out. When it stops, i'm buried. Complete darkness, and all i can feel is the weight of the snow on top of me. I try to push up, but the snow is too heavy. I'm stuck here. I try again to push.....

..... but the weight of the blanket is too heavy. Blanket, i'm dreaming. Wake up. I force myself to wake up. I get to the point of awareness but still not able to push this ton of snow off of me. I'm laying in my room in the darkness with my blanket that weighs a thousand pounds. A little more... there it goes. I push the blanket down and sit up in bed. Awake, wow. That brief moment, where i'm completely aware of where i am and that i was dreaming, but still not physically able to react to it... thats a cool feeling. I should blog about this, i thought.

I laid back down and fell asleep pretty quickly. I was laying under my blankets, thinking about how pitch black it is. (In actuality, there's a light that shines into my room from the street and pisses me off.) As i slip back into my dream, i'm laying under a blanket in a bed, in a pitch black room. But my point of view is from the corner of the ceiling, looking down, and the scene is in night vision. Its weird... I'm thinking from my point of view, but looking from the corner of the ceiling. "So dark...," I'm thinking. The blizzard is roaring outside. "Thank god you're ok," she says. Who? Who said that? The woman in the ceiling. There's a woman above the ceiling talking to me. I can't hear it though, its in my thoughts. I know thats where she is. I tug the blanket closer to me and try to ignore her. She's something to fear, but i don't know why.

I hear pitter patter around my head on the bed. Whats out there? Where am I. Now i'm under the blanket, not in the corner of the ceiling anymore. I have no idea whats on the other side of this blanket, in the darkness. No more night vision, just darkness. Sounds of something lightly walking around on the bed about my head are frightening as hell. (I think i woke up briefly here, and was like... frozen in fear, and didn't move, and fell right back asleep. What a panzy.) What are those sounds!

Out of nowhere the nightvision is back, i'm looking from the ceiling corner again, and 8 huge legs come out of the ceiling directly above the sleeping me. What is that! It crashes down on top of my body, it's a huge spider with a human womans head. She's punching my sleeping body with her eight hairy creepy legs. Her body is enormous. She throws 4 of her legs in the air and the ceiling of the room blows away. From my ceiling corner, i look up and see the blizzard sky. Looking back down at my sleeping body, I'm still hiding under the blankets. "Go away," i'm thinking. The spiders human woman head looks right at me ... me in the ceiling corner .... and i see her teeth, but its not a human woman head. Its a demon head, sexless, with a red glow around it. Its smiling, but i don't know how i know that. It doesn't look like its smiling. I break away from its gaze and see my body scurrying out of the room.... good! run! The demon spider shrieks and lunges at my point of view in the ceiling corner, but i'm looking from my body now. Looking back over my shoulder at the spider lunging at the corner of the room.

When i wake up, i'm still under my blankets. Giant wimp that i am, I'm afraid to come out. It took a few seconds, but i forced myself to move the blankets away and stand up. Its 2:45am... i only went to sleep at 2:20 or so. That dream(s) seemed to happen in a heartbeat. I'm still a little spooked to look at the bed area next to me. I'm afraid there's a demon spider there. I looked anyway and there wasn't. I got up and opened my bedroom door cautiously, so as not to be sneak attacked by the demon. Just my regular dining room. I'm coming out of grogginess now, and the fear is fading away. I'm already hoping i don't forget the dream so i can blog about it. That thought must have been left over from before.

I went out and had a glass of water, splashed some water on my face in the bathroom, and went back to bed. Later on that night i jerked awake suddenly, a little spooked again, but i came out of it quickly, and couldn't even remember what i had dreamt about, if anything.